I was [usually] aware that you were merely a delusion, but I didn’t give a fuck. I was just living for the thrill of the moment, not giving a thought to the painful consequences of reality. Since you have been gone, I have had to seek that crazy bliss all on my own. It is not quite the same. But it gets me through… like a swallow of water in a desert. Not enough to truly hydrate, but enough to sustain life… for now.